Breakin Ankles

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Two random thoughts of the day

1) Wouldn't it be weird if when you went to take a shit, the food came out exactly the way it went in?

2) You know who's really happy about the prevalence of bluetooth headsets these days? Crazy people. When people started using bluetooth headsets, people would often see individuals talking on the street with their hands at their sides, a phone nowhere in sight. They'd therefore assume the person was talking to themselves and was otherwise crazy. But now, if you see someone seemingly talking to no one while they walk down the street, you just automatically assume they have a wireless headset on. So, there must be a whole slew of legitimately crazy people walking around muttering sweet nothings to significant others who don't exist who are therefore able to shield themselves from the 'Crazy' label. Bluetooth headsets have effectively allowed crazy people to seamlessly blend into society. Actually, now that I think about it, technology as a whole might one day totally blur the line between what we perceive as normal and crazy. It wouldn't surprise me if in 5 years I see my good friend KT massaging a tree with her hands while she talks into an acorn. "Have you gone mad?!" I'd ask -- to which she'd reply "no, you idiot. I'm just updating my facebook photo album while I check my voicemail." Sound crazy? Sure, it does today, but tomorrow?

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Less Fur. More Diamonds!

What's the deal with semi-attractive, full-on ditzy girls being so gung ho about animal rights? I'm sure you all know what I'm talking about. There seems to be an abundance of sorority-esque girls with fake nails and pink voloure sweatsuits, with tiffany heart bracelets who adore tiny little dogs and hate "mean people" who abuse animals. Now don't get me wrong, I in no way condone, endorse, or approve of dog fighting or any other type of animal abuse. What amuses/annoys me, however, are some of the girls who are so against it. What tickles my funny bone is that some of these animal crusaders seem to be living in some sort of fantasy world where they view all animals as tiny teddy bears, and since they seem to have some sort of infantile-esque way of interacting with society at large, they view all animals as "cutesy wootsey" and if anyone dares hurt one of their beloved "animawls".. well, then they're just a big 'meany'.

It's like Pamela Anderson. I get that she's all for animal rights. Well kudos to her, but just get out of my face about it. Actually, I take that back. Pamela Anderson agreed to a Comedy Central Roast 2 years ago on the condition that all proceeds go to fight animal abuse. That roast was hilarious, so I can't rag on her really. Maybe it's because I watch a lot of MTV, but I feel that I've seen way to many "you just hate me cuz I'm cute" type of girls who think they're the shit. The odd part is, it's not that their attitude really bugs me. It's the fact that they have a "cause" that really gets to me. I guess I think that they're too ditzy, stupid, and/or shallow to really care about something. Maybe I'm just being closed minded, but when you see a girl with fake nails and a little dog inside a 1000 dollar purse talk passionately about animal rights... well I don't know about you, but I just find it super annoying. A comparison: let's take your typical beach blonde california ditz and find her beach bodied male counterpart with a similar type of "I'm the shit" attitude. You with me brah? Okay, now imagine how annoying it would be if that same guy was a big advocate of stopping global warming. Hmm.. on second thought, I don't think this comparison really makes much sense. So to sum up: I find it extremely annoying when ditzy girls are so passionate about animal rights. It's not that they don't have the right to care about something, its more so that I envision them having some sort of childlike interest in the well-being of animals rather than having an opinion based on any sort of logical and rational thought process. Okay, now I'm going overboard but I never really ranted on here before so I thought I'd give it a try.

Peace.

 
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