Breakin Ankles

Thursday, July 21, 2005

Musical T-shirts

Aerosmith is a good band and all, but do not, I repeat, DO NOT, ever trust a guy wearing an Aerosmith t-shirt. Are such guys un-trustworthy or sneaky? Not neccessarily. Actually, on second thought, I'm not sure. There is just something unsettling about a guy wearing an Aerosmith t-shirt.

If you see a person wearing a Marilyn Manson t-shirt, you better pray that they're still in high school. Otherwise, proceed with caution.

If you see someone wearing a Phish t-shirt, you can probably throw your wallet at them, and they'd pick it up and give it back to you saying "Hey man, I think you dropped this.." When you say "thank you", they'll probably say "for what?" - Be understanding though, they're probably still recovering from a night of tripping off acid while bathing in a tub filled with melted ben and jerry's ice cream.

If you see a guy wearing a Dave Matthews t-shirt, you can play a fun little game. Ask them what Frat they're in and act like you're in the same one. Then, ask if they saw "that Dave show in that city where they did a killer jam session for 20 mins straight". Hijinks, and possibly more (sic), will ensue. *

If you see a guy wearing a Sublime t-shirt, think to yourself that Sublime rules and is a great band. Watch for a bevy of tattoos and wallet chains. If you do not like Sublime, proceed with caution.

If you see a guy wearing a John Mayer t-shirt, approach and say, "Dude, are you serious?"

Speaking of Aerosmith, back in high school, every guy was in love with Alicia Silverstone on account of her riveting performances in those Aerosmith videos.

* I do not know what the term "(sic)" is used for, but it seems cool so I thought I'd throw it in there.


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