Breakin Ankles

Thursday, June 30, 2005

Haters

Ever notice how some girls are haters? Do you find it extremely annoying? If so, you are not alone.

Girls will hate on other girls and not think twice about it. I've never understood why girls tend to do this, but its a very big turn off. Guys are never like "Yo man, check out that dudes shirt, its so tacky... and check out that guys hair, you know he gets it highlighted." Guys don't give a shit. Some common phrases one might hear around a female hater:

"Oh my gosh, look at what that girl's wearing, is she trying to be a ho?"

"Her boobs are so fake"

"I bet that girl looks ugly without makeup on"

"I hate her"

I don't know why girls are haters, but I do know this: It's very refreshing to be out with a girl who can compliment other girls instead of making fun of them.

Did you know that there are many different kinds of haters out there? Yes, its true!

THE CLEVER HATER: This type of girl will hate on other girls in a roundabout way. She will pick out a girl in a bar who is mildly attractive, and build her up with amazing compliments. "That girl in the red is like a super model!" In turn, whoever she is with will respond with "what? she's not that pretty". For you see, the clever hater fiendishly attempts to turn you into the hater! Clever? Indeed. Reprehnsible? No doubt!

THE JEALOUS HATER: This type of girl is jealous of, and will therefore hate on, any girl that gets a lot of attention at a bar. Jealous haters have been known to remark "You know hes just talking to her cuz shes a slut". A Jealous Hater will see a Nun talking to a hot guy and say "You know he's only talking to her cuz she puts out." Harsh, but some girls are that jealous. It's true. I've seen the documentation.

THE DEVIOUS HATER: This type of girl focuses most of her hating energies on her own friends. Yes, such girls do exist! Girls will be mad if one of their friends are having more luck in the man department than they are, so they start hating! Why? I have no fucking clue! Guys, on the other hand, are the complete opposites. If a guy is having no luck with the ladies, and his friends are out there mackin it up, the guy will be like "yo man, what's your secret!? What am I doing wrong? Gimme some pointers bro!" A guy will see his friends on the mountain top and says "Give me a hand!" A Devious Hater sees one of her friends on the mountain top and starts spreading gossip like the plague, and praying that her friend falls down from the mountain.

THE SELF HATER a.ka. THE FISHER: This type girl makes fun of herself only to hear reassurances from other people that she is, in fact, pretty etc. This type of hater is also known as THE FISHER - as fishing for compliments is how they get down and boogie. A Self Hater might say something like, "I'm really just not that pretty." First of all, who says that out of the blue?! Second of all, its obvious that its only being said so that whoever she is with can say "What are you talking about, you're gorgeous!", to which The Self Hater would respond "No I'm not". This little exchange can go on for hours, days even. Sadly, these girls require constant reassurance from others to maintain their self esteem.

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